This week has been fairly full on.. It's odd to think that almost a year ago I thought I'd lost him forever... :/ But this week I've had it proven to me that I will never really lose him, regardless of what happens... He was always there when everyone else left and promised me he always will be there... He keeps proving me that he's keeping his promise to me that he will never let me go... And that just makes it hard for me to want to get with a guy... >_< Its awful.. But thank shit I'm bi-sexual :D
Yesterday was my first day of work experience and it was AWESOME! I got to be in a film thing they're doing for Dublin Firefighters training something something... I was basically lying on a bed for the entire time :D AND! I got paid 8 quid for it, hella yeah. :) It was awesome... The downside to yesterday was I felt shit the entire day and so many times i thought I could throw up D: Not nice...
Today was um... Eventful. o.O I went with my mom to pick up my sister from the hospital after she'd gotten her tonsils out, she's doing surprisingly awesome which rocks... The downside to me not feeling well today? I nearly passed out in the hospital >_< I was really lucky though in a way cause the nurse was talking to my mom beside me. It was a fairly evenful day :)
Last night... It was oddly nice even though I was feeling shit and couldn't sleep... Ronan stayed up with me for alot of it... It was nice cause I knew he had stuff to do today... He doesn't think I owe him anything but in all honesty I'd be nowhere near where I am right now without him. I probably wouldn't even be here so I do owe him alot... Since he doesn't really want me to do anything for him I'm going to draw him something while he's away. That way he won't see it by accident if he came over :) I really hope it turns out good though and he likes it >_< He's never really seen any of my drawings o.O
Something else that was uber awesome about last night is that he said I should hang out with him and his friends in town tomorrow and then go back to his for pizza. It was really cool cause he's gonna introduce me to Alley. I used to be so jealous of her cause he wanted to be with her.. But I realised nothing will take away from what I have with him... It should be awesome cause he said she's quite like me in ways and she's gonna need a friend for over the summer while peoples are away and at CTYI and stuffs... Like I will.. :) He did also say to me that I deserve someone who won't decide to fuck me over, I agree completely, and he thinks Alley is that person. I do hope it works out and she likes me >_< It'll uber suck if she doesn't but oh well...
I have now come to the conclusion that I do not want to have a boyfriend. I don't think I'll ever get or have what I want again with a guy unless it's with him again... :/ But I'm very happy to get a girlfriend since the only one I've had has fucked me over repeatedly. I shall not go out looking for someone but if something happens with a girl and I end up liking them and they end up liking me then... I don't see any problem with that... :)
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