Friends ♥

So the past few days have been kinda hard for me for some reason.. It's been easy for me to cry, which is odd for me seeing as over the past two or so years its taken something incredibly bad or whatnot to set me off.. But the past few nights it has been small little things like feeling alone or missing someone. I miss my friends. I feel like I'm losing some of them, ones I'd really like to keep in my life. Today and yesterday have made me realise I'm not really losing everyone, it's all in my head. I have the most amazing friends and I just really need to realise that they are my friends, they are here to help me out or talk to me, they are there for me, like I am for them. I have to stop needing reminders for that. I should be able to accept I do deserve the friends I have, that I do deserve to be happy. I still can't, not yet, not fully. I don't know why exactly, but I'm getting there. I know I should be allowed to be happy... I also know I should put myself first sometimes and I'm slowly starting to do that. For the first time in my life I'm able to take time just for me. And I think the friends I currently have help and let me do that. I need time for me daily, and when it comes to that, my friends understand as well as encourage it. And I am extremely greatful for that.

Something else the friends I have now have helped me do is get rid of anyone that may have been causeing me stress, making me feel worthless, making me feel like I don't deserve to be happy, anyone that was making me feel bad about myself, my friends gave me the strength and the courage to get the out. If anyone makes you feel any of those things, or even worse, then they don't deserve to know you. I have dealt with liars, cheats, back stabbers, two faced people all my life, and I don't need them. I don't need any of that in my life. I am a strong person, whether thats something I believe all the time, or only occassionally doesn't matter, because I know I am strong. And if I need someone out of my life for whatever reason, I will get them out of my life. I will cut them out of my life for good. My friends have made me a better person, made me stronger, and made me realise who I am, or becoming.

This blog is about my friends. I don't think I should name any because they should know who they are. If any of you are reading this, I love you and I don't ever want you to not be in my life. :)